Tough Day Today
Thank you all for sharing your pain and suffering during treatment. You ARE true warriors. Reality is setting in today and I am having a mentally tough time processing all of this. Started crying after hearing a very beautiful song today appreciating it in a deeply personal way that I have never done before. I appreciate your honesty when sharing with me all the difficult moments while fighting this disease. Your comments will assist me greatly as I prepare for this battle. A thought just came to me. Would it a good idea to self-donate blood just in case I need transfusion for low blood count? I know I'm crazy right? Just going through the disaster preparedness drill. Also, I am open to any good tips to minimize the damage from treatment.
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I had two blood infusions at the same time. It was also towards the end of treatment and really helped me feel better. At the end of my first day of treatment, at the dinner table, my husband announced to our son. Your mom is a real hero. Once I made the decision to go forward, I was determined. I did everything I could find to help my success. Friend prayed for me, I did a visualized during each radiation treatment of destroying the invaders, think Luke Skywalker shooting through the death star, and other characters. But, it also helps to rally your family and friends to your side. If it's terrifying to tell people exactly what you have, just say colon cancer or of the digestive track. Whatever. You need their support at this time. All the best, and keep us posted.
I always thought of the people who were praying or thinking of me while I was lying on the radiotherapy table, I found it very comforting. Keep hydrated always. You will get through this.
Know that everyone's treatment moves along differently. When my doctor would say "this is what is going to happen....this is what you will be doing... etc etc" I would say "we'll see."
ask your doctor about the blood transfusion idea you have. it's a good one i think. I had a transfusion towards the end and for me, that was a hard decision to put someone else's blood in my body. But it was the right decision.
If you want time to give blood and wait to start, ask about that. Be on your own schedule. This is a slow growing cancer. I am very tiny and so I told them I wanted to wait two weeks so that I could put on 10 lbs. I did it and was so very glad I did. Starting at 92 bs a loss of 18 would have been a lot. But at 102, not as bad!
Listen to your body. You know it better than anyone. Listen to your heart. I disagree with somoeone below who said call your cancer colon cancer. Be proud of yourself. This is just another body part and being a warrior is bringing awareness of challenges into the light. Never be ashamed of yourself or what you have.
There will be trauma around the treatment which is intrusive and can seem to violate. Know that you will heal and you will be whole and vibrant and even more fully alive in the future, having weathered this storm.
The best thing I did was make my radiation treatments the best part of my day. I wore a headset and listened to Yoga Nidra for 25 min. each time - not only did it help to heal me (I set an intention of minimizing burns but healing cancer and it really did work) but I actually looked forward to this part of my day each time. The radiation team saw the power of it and began suggesting it to others. Be in touch with me if you want some recordings, that will be my gift to you my anal cancer sister.
Ask yourself what you need, seek support wherever you can, ask for help even for the things you do not need help with and you will - in time- shine more brightly than ever!
I am 11 years out. One of the "older" success stories on this site. I got it before Farrah and before it suddenly became more common. In 2006, there was not one thing on the web about anal cancer in women! I guess I was a pioneer in some ways.
I had an amazing life before cancer, but do you know what? My life now is so rich and I am filled with more humbleness and kindness and generosity - I actually love myself more than ever and feel more at peace every day.
Be strong, be soft, be open, be subborn. You've got this!
Gearing up for treatment is intense. I found the week before treatment and the week after treatment to be two of the hardest. 1 mentally, 1 physically.